Hello, guys. Ratih here.
I'll share my thoughts on femininity and masculinity in Islam, so if you relate, feel free to read the explanation to the end!
Since I was a kid, I've loved wearing clothes like boys, and I've often thought that I was supposed to be born as a boy. I've always envied boys because they behave simply and dress modestly, etc. (Astaghfirullah for this)
I'm sure that most of you feel the same, a desire to act like a boy is usually influenced by family, friends, environment, etc. Furthermore, being a tomboy girl is claimed 'cool' for some people. That's why many girls do this.
Thankfully, as I've grown older, I've learned more about Islamic teachings, which has helped me understand more about femininity and masculinity, especially in women.
As a Muslim, in my religion, it's forbidden to behave like a boy and vice versa, based on the Sahih Hadith below.
Narrated by Abdullah ibn Abbas:
The Prophet (ï·º) cursed effeminate men and those women who assume the similitude (manners) of men. (Sahih al-Bukhari 5886)
Based on this Hadith, we can clearly see that Allah SWT will not bless those who act in a way that goes against their natural disposition. However, it doesn't mean that girls can't be as strong as boys, though.
There are some strong women in Islam who fought for their religion without losing their identity as Muslim women. Who are they?
Asma binti Abu Bakar was a prominent female companion who embraced Islam at an early age. Not only was she skilled in poetry and eloquent in speech, but she also participated in the Battle of Yarmuk, earning her the title 'Dzaatin Nithaqain,' or the woman with two belts.
Then there's Asma binti Yazid Al-Anshoriah, a renowned Arab orator, brave and always at the forefront. Her role in the Battle of Yarmuk was significant, as she managed to kill nine Roman soldiers on the battlefield.
There's also Gazalah Al-Haruriah, Hindun binti Utbah bin Rabiah, and Juwairiyah binti Abu Sofyan, who participated in the Battle of Yarmuk by providing drinks and medical aid and directly engaging in battle, killing enemies of Islam.
In the Battle of Khadisiyah, there was Khansa binti Amru, whose poetry impressed the Prophet Muhammad. It was Khansa who inspired her four sons to fight in the battle, and they all died as martyrs.
Then there's Khaulah binti Azwar Al-Asadi, whose military activities resembled those of Khalid bin Walid. There's Laila Al-Gifariah, from a respected family, who willingly accompanied the Prophet to the battlefield to treat the sick and wounded fighters. During the 'Jamal' battle, she went to Basra to fight alongside Ali bin Abi Tholib.
Rabayi’ binti Mi’waz, a female companion who pledged allegiance to the Prophet and participated in various battles. Then there's Ummu Haram, who joined the Muslim forces in the conquest of Cyprus with her husband. She fell from her horse during this battle and became a martyr.
And then there's Ummu Imaroh, whose achievements are remarkable. From the pledge of Aqobah, the Battle of Uhud, the Treaty of Hudaibiyah, the Battle of Khaibar, to the Battle of Hunain, this brave woman participated in all of them. In the Battle of Uhud, she sustained twelve wounds, and during the Battle of Yamamah, one of her hands was severed. (Subhanallah)
If you're a Muslim tomboy woman and can relate to this, I hope you can also learn from the best women in Islam as I mentioned before. No matter how much we desire to act or dress like a man for worldly happiness by fulfilling our desires, it's not blessed. So, have faith that sacrificing our worldly desires for the hereafter rewards is way more beautiful.
However, as women, we must have strength in ourselves to fight for our values, our dignity, and our religion as much as we can. Don't easily surrender to things that weaken our faith and personal value.
In summary, being a tomboy girl who just wants to act or dress like a boy is not a special or even a cool thing. It's a sin. However, being a strong girl who holds personal values is a must in Islam. So, be a strong girl, not just a tomboy. 😊
